Day 4 : No Coffee


Dear Internet,

I think it’s becoming pretty clear that coffee doesn’t have a significant impact on me. I suppose if I drank more of it than I do, it would, but at this point I’m not really having any withdrawal symptoms, other than missing being able to go down and chat with The Coffee Lady once a day.

If I DO go back to coffee (and I will, for social reasons as much as anything) I’m going to cut out a lot of the sugar I put in it, and get a real creamer (the powdered creamers add MORE sugar, plus tasty chemicals!). And no, self, that does not mean you can have the marshmallow fudge flavored creamer.

I’ll stick out the rest of the week, since there’s only two days left, and hey, why not? But next week I’ll go back to my single cup a day, I think.

I didn’t go jogging this morning, but it was because one of my thighs felt odd, and when I was jogging yesterday, I had joint pain, even though I was on the grass. I figure I’ll give myself a day or so of rest.

However, since I’ve already had my lazy morning where I didn’t get up and run, I lifted weights instead.

I’m pretty wussy, so I just did a couple reps (ha! That makes it sound so structured) with a five pound dumbbell over my head and behind my back. That’s supposed to help with the under-the-arm flab that I so despise.

Then I did some..umm..curls? with the bar and two five-pound weights, and then some over the head up and down thingers with the same one. Stopped when I started to shake dangerously (usually around nine), went and cut tomatoes for breakfast omelet, then went back and did it again, then mixed up the eggs and put the pan on the burner, then did it again, tried to collapse into a puddle, failed, and made my breakfast.

I’ve done this before and gotten to the point where I needed to upgrade the weights, so I’m looking forward to hitting that stage again.

I should add pushups and crunches into the mix too. The funny thing about pushups is that they’ll get EASIER once I lose some weight. Ha!

Stepped on the scale this morning, which showed me at about 163. Exceptionally unlikely that’s real weight loss, but it felt damn good anyway.

What with all the working out and weights, I expect to stop being able to trust the scale soon. I really really really need to go to the fabric store and pick up a soft measuring tape. It’s my measurements that will be most useful to me as time goes by. I mean, sure, once my pants and shirts start tenting, that’ll be a sign I’m shrinking where I should be, but I’d rather have a more…measureable guide than that.

And again I felt a twinge of guilt talking about my weight and putting actual numbers down. I know that I’m not grossly overweight. However, I’m only 5’3, and I have a slight build. All the online Body Fat tests and whatnot put me at “Very Overweight” – and that’s a good way to put it. I’m headed down a dark road. I look at my family, and I see what I could so easily become, and I don’t want to be there. I love my aunts, mother, and grandmother, but I don’t want to look like that. I don’t want to be skinny only because disease is wracking my body, or because I started smoking at 45.

I want to be healthy. When I was in high school, I was one of those creepy skeleton girls – I weighed less than 110 when I started college, and I was not on a diet, nor did I have an eating disorder. I was active, and had a really crappy diet.

I don’t want to be there again. My “castle in the clouds” goal is 125. If I dip below that, I’m actually going to get worried. My realistic starter goal is 140. Depending on how difficult it is to reach that plateau, I may decide to make a second goal beneath it. Those are both healthy weights for me.

Plus, I don’t want to lose my boobs. I’d be happy to make it out of DD territory, but I don’t particularly want to flirt with a B. A C would be a nice compromise, I think. I’ve found (to my unhappiness) that Victoria’s Secret treats anyone above a C as a genetic freak, and stops stocking all the fun patterns and cuts very much.

And if anyone knows anywhere I can get really good bras that ISN’T Victoria’s Secret, let me know. I will not order online. Trying to find my size in the brands available at ShopKo is enough to send me into hysterics (it took over an hour the last time I went, and if my husband wasn’t so awesome and supportive, I might have started sobbing in the fitting room). I ended up getting some REALLY awesome, comfortable, and supportive bras from the Queen Latifah set – Curvation. Love her movies (Last Holiday is SUCH an incredible movie), but it looks like she actually cares about giving bigger women bras that aren’t holdovers from medieval torture chambers, too. Two thumbs WAY up.

Well, that’s probably enough rambling for today.

For anyone reading these, do you find it easier when I keep the bolded headers for sections? Do you prefer the more pointed posts, as opposed to me rambling on? I want to know. (And yes, I know, whatever I enjoy best is what I should do. I’m asking because I want to know your opinion.)

Curiously Yours,
The Dieting Ninja


No Responses Yet to “Day 4 : No Coffee”

  1. Leave a Comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: